Say It Ain't So

You can say whatever you want, whenever you want, to whoever you want.

Go look at your Facebook feed. You can say whatever you want and there is little to no recourse for saying something wrong, offensive, or polarizing. You might get some rough comments from people polarized the opposite direction as you. You might get affirmation from people who agree with you.

But either way, you can say whatever you think to be true to a community of people who have decided they want to be your friend.

Is this really so different from two thousand years ago sitting around in the local city gates or town square and talking about the politics of the day? You could say whatever you want then too.

If you walked up to the conversation and someone didn’t want to hear what you had to say, they could walk away. But I am guessing people still sat around and agreed with their counterparts and objected against the other side.

The only difference I can see today is scale. Facebook connects us to more people than before. Today we are responsible for what we say just as much as we were 2000 years ago. And the same as 2000 years ago, the guy who thinks the earth is flat was not persuaded otherwise over the campfire or the Facebook post. Nothing any of the round earth people said ever made a difference. Why would they be persuaded today?

Should you post the next opinionated Facebook post? Should you gush your opinion into the comment section of your friend’s political post? Should you really post that? Should you really?

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Public Opinion

I recently was struck by a very public conversation I have been hearing about. It is is in regards to a million and one details and has strings stretching farther than I could imagine, no matter how creative I think I am.

The most critical part of the conversation to me now is the publicity of it all. Both sides of the coin have always been very private groups. Never divulging too much more than they need. For this conversation, they have been hyper public. They have been leveraging public opinion against each other. Making points. Swaying intermediaries and everyone of course weighs in on the whole thing because everyone has an opinion and everyone else needs to give theirs too.

No one is stopping to ask if this conversation needs to be public. I have been more and more adopting a policy of dealing with things in the moment. This is practically a good policy for me right now, not necessarily permanent. If someone goes off the rails, it is better for me to wave a flag in the moment than wait. I know if I wait, I will never speak up.

I would never bring one of these situations up in a public forum to be discussed in the public court of opinion. I would betray my counterparts in these moments if I take private matters public. Private matters should be private for a reason. Nobody is better when I force a private matter into the public when it obviously belongs private. Personally, I would be immensely hurt if someone made my private matters public, hence I would never do that. What good can come from forcing private matters into the public? Do we really need so many extra opinions in conversations designed for private offices?

How do you deal with things? Do private matters come up too often in public? Do you deal with issues in a timely fashion? Does your reaction scale to the action?

Privately,

–JT

Opinions

Over time I have learned to need and to fit in. I have not often felt like I needed to fit in, whether it be with a mass or a large group. I am somewhat avoidant of large groups in general. I do not generally see the need to be a part of a larger group. I find I am most comfortable in the presence of a few close friends. 

The opinion of these people is paramount to me.

If one of these few people were to say I am pointed in the wrong direction, I would almost immediately adjust course and change direction. 

I do not generally value the opinion and voice of strangers. People I don’t know at all or very little really. I can even think of situations where complete strangers have inserted there opinions into my life completely unsolicited and I have been so repulsed. I am open to conversations about decisions I make. However, to blatantly tell me what to do or how to do what I do without any relationship with me is completely offensive. In the even one of these people were to voice an opinion about me being pointed in the wrong direction. I would reevaluate, analyze, and process their words to find the truth behind what they are saying. (There is always truth behind an opposing opinion, you have to find out what that truth is before embracing or dismissing it.) After analyzing, I would embrace or dismiss, partially or fully, their opinion and move forward accordingly. 

I have not often found value in trying to give strangers a voice in my life. I expect to earn my right to speak into their lives and vice-versa. 

Who’s perspective do you value and hold in high regard? Who’s opinion should you hold in high regard?

Selectively,

–JT