Every day I wake up in the same set of skin and bones I was born with. I can change and develop who I am through work, both intentional and unintentional. But at the end of the day, I am always me.

One of the the many jobs I have is to appreciate me for who I am. In a reasonable way, be comfortable in the set of skin and bones I have. Accepting me for who I am, not over accentuating my flaws and strengths.

I know I can find the right point of appreciating myself for who I am. Not too confident and not too self-deprecating.

Not too many puns.

Not too nerdy.

Not too quiet.

Not too self conscience.

When I reach that point, what happens next?

I know I will reach the island of Perfect Self Acceptance. But what happens when it starts raining on my island? Or worse, I run out of food.

When I get to my Island, am I ready for the negative comment I hear, meant as a friendly joke? Am I prepared to let it roll off my back?

I know proper self acceptance is possible, but am I preparing for the next step of keeping healthy perspective on myself despite (un)expected negative circumstances?

What does your island of self acceptance look like? Are you ready for what it takes to maintain life on your island in the face of (un)expected negative circumstances?

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Recently, I had the opportunity to get out of town with my wife and really just get away. Just an overnight trip nothing too elaborate; but, definitely a gem in the month of January, so quickly after the holidays. During this trip I found myself speaking out. Pointing out issues to store clerks, a little more aggressive in my ability to pick out issues in conversations with strangers, and generally more apt to fight for a little more than what I was being given. I wasn’t being mean. I wasn’t being rude. I wasn’t obnoxious, annoying, or demeaning. I was genuinely pointing out what I saw, asking for help when I needed it, and using my voice.

Was

Awesome.

If you’ve never tried it, you should!

As we were heading home and talking about our trip together, my wife pointed out these differences in me. She appreciated the difference, especially as my outspokenness was not a combative maneuvers towards her during an “intense moment of fellowship.”

I reflected reflected on the difference, pondered, chuckled, and said, “I decided to choose me.”

Choosing me resonates deep within my core. Especially right now. I am in a place where I am meeting adversity. In the face of adversity, I am still going to choose me. Previously, I would have just laid down and given up. I would have kept quiet. I would have been taken what I was given. This time I to chose me and I am not going to give up. I am not going to choose me because I am better or have a marginal superiority. I am going to choose me because I was chosen first.

How often do you choose you?

Choosing

–JT