Asking About Now

I went to see my counselor again. This time I was much more open-ended in my perspective and expectations. I had a small discussion of what I wanted to talk to him about, slightly prepared conversation about me overreacting at times. That was a good conversation and a portion of what we had to talk about. 

The majority of our conversation revolved around asking questions. Asking many questions. Good questions. The best questions really. Questions about where you are at. Right now. Not asking about where you are going or the future or what comes next. Asking questions about where you are at right now and allowing you to work through the implications of where you are at. That then will dictate where you go. Usually, this ends up being somewhat similar to where I think people should go. However, it is not for me to decide where people should go. What I must do is listen intently and ask questions about people and where they are at based on what they are telling me. I do love listening. 

Based on what I understand about the conversation, I get to listen, analyze, and ask. The hard part for me is going to be not asking and leading. Simply crafting masterful questions about where people are at in the moment and allowing them to lead the conversation to the next step to where we are going. Ultimately, I am listening to them as they are brought to a place where healing and wholeness is possible.

When was the last time someone asked you about how you’re doing?

When will be the next time you talk to someone about how you’re doing?

How well do you do at asking someone about where they are at, not where you think they should go?

Listening,

–JT

When I Am Better

I find it funny when things are going well how hard it become to continue to work hard. When I’m on the bottom or behind, I have to work harder, it is when things are going well I find myself starting to become complacent, relaxed, and I start to slack. For maybe the first time in my life, I’m doing well and I’m seeing how much work I have ahead of me (this is not to say I have never been doing well before, simply I have never had this realization in tandem with doing well.) I am seeing the triggers where I might normally become complacent and I am not going to give in to them. I am also seeing the triggers where I might over extend and take on too much because I am doing well and I am healthy, I am not going to give in to those triggers either. I am going to stand in the tension, allow myself to be pulled and try to always be aware of where I am in the tension. 

This is going to be interesting. Fun. Maybe even exciting at times. I look forward to where things will be going as I feel like I’m almost on top of the world with how well my life is going. My life is not this good because of me, my life is this good because of my community and the team I get to be a part of. I have been blessed with amazing opportunities and responsibilities. Now I am allowed to rise to the occasion and show the true measure of my character in successes and failures. 

I look forward to both. 

Where are you at in the tension of work and rest or complacency and success?

Battling on,

–JT

Wake Me Up, When December Ends

I’ve been wrestling. (I’m sure this is a surprise.) But I have been wrestling with myself and why now. Why December? Why not next summer? Why not never? Why not when I’m 73 and retired? Why now? 

Why a sabbatical now, in December of 2014?

Then it struck me. Finally. The question spun itself. When better than right now? 

I’m going to be seeing family and friends. I’m going to have time to spend with these people. Not for the usual purpose of being unruly young men. Or the general celebrations with family where we are all meeting and greeting and small talking. I’ll be seeing them this year to talk about my mess. I’ll be seeing them this year to help them deal with their mess. 

This is the season where you and I are met in our messy places to be healed.

The season where I know I can find healing.

What are you going to use this season for?