Napkin

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I was out with friends and needed to jot down a quick of note. I had a pen at hand. I snagged the clean napkin at hand and began trying to scribble on the napkin. It was awful. One of the worst writing experiences of my life. The napkin kept catching and ripping. Genuinely, not designed for writing. I was able to get the note onto what was left of the napkin when I was done with it. 

The paper napkin was the wrong platform. It was the wrong medium. It is cheap. It is expendable. It is designed to be thrown away at the end of its use. It really was not up for the job and I had to work harder than I should have in order to get my note onto it. The napkin sparked in me a series of thoughts and questions. I started to wonder how often I tried to use napkins when I needed paper or phone? How often does my creative solution actually hinder me more than enhance my work?

Then again, what does my solution say about the problem to begin with? A disposable napkin to write something down? What is the point? The napkin barely holds my writing. It is not meant to be kept, it is meant to be thrown away. I put my note, mildly important note, onto something destined for the recycle bin. It is not meant to be used this way. It is not a medium for long form writing, short form writing, notes, or scribbles. It is not even a medium worth keeping around. It is the medium for wiping the crumbs from my mouth or grease from my fingers.

As I am trying to focus on the extraordinary and let go of the mundane am I actually hindering my ability to grow because I am trying to be too creative? Where can I skip the napkins? Where am I scribbling on trash? Where do I need to replace my tools?

Truly, I grabbed the closest thing I saw and started using it. I did not even question as to whether or not I should pull out my phone and scribble my note into my phone. I chose the wrong tool and stuck with it. How often do I do that? Or even worse, my methods were sub par. How often do I use mediocre methods and not question them because I am essentially sticking my head in the sand.

Unfortunately, the answer to all of these questions is, ‘Too often.’ 

Where are your choices causing you to fall short of success? Where are the tools you are using hindering you? What other tools are out there to enhance what you are doing?

Retooling,

–JT

Experiences

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Often times I am filled with assessment and analytics on what is going on around me. Not so much hard data, numbers, and graphs, but more gut feelings. I will see a friend about to do something I have done a number of times and I know there is a natural pitfall and it is easy to fall into it. So I speak up. I tell the person about the pitfall. Where its origins are, how it works and, most importantly, how to avoid it. 

When suddenly I hear a voice in the void between me and my friend telling them about the pitfalls etcetera. A voice of caring and concern. I listen intently to the voice and appreciate their care to help my friend. As I listen, the voice become more familiar. I know the cadence, vernacular, and phrasing. The voice is very reasonable even. The voice is making some of the same points and sharing experiences I have. 

I look up expectant of seeing someone I know helping my friend and sharing helpful tips and trick. 

There is not anyone there. 

The voice is mine. 

And the voice never left my head.

My friend gets up and moves along to their next destination and I have not said a word.

What will my friend do? I hope they make it ok. I hope they do not end up engaging in any of the same pitfalls I ran into. I better connect with them quickly. I better make sure they know what they have ahead of themselves. I would hate for them to hit any of the same speed bumps I did when they are so avoidable. I hope it is not too late. 

What experiences do you have? What experiences have you not shared?

Sharing,

–JT

Today

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One day I will go back to Israel. One day I will go back to Ireland. One day there will be a cure for cancer. One day I will replace my old tired Subaru. 

The issue with 'one day' is it never comes in time. Often times 'one day' never comes at all. 'One day' will even be a myth at times. It has not timeline. ‘one day’ is truly giving up on the present. ‘One day’ insinuates today is not enough. It insinuates tomorrow will have something I do not currently have. It insinuates I am waiting for something outside of my control. 'One day' meanssomething is coming I need, and I cannot continue forward without it.

‘One day’ abdicates my responsibility for today. 

‘One day’ is an excuse.

‘One day’ is a lie…a lie I tell myself.

How often do you tell yourself this lie? What other lies do you tell yourself?

Today,

–JT

Quarterly Reviews

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Given the new year and my views on annual resolutions, I have been struggling a little with the concept of how to better grow and improve. I dislike forcing an annual plan where I have to accomplish X, Y, and Z in twelve months or I am a failure. And truly resolutions are semi-synonymous with, “a cute goal I won’t achieve this year.” 

I struggle because I can lose track of the goals I am working towards and the way I am moving forward in the areas outside of work. Growing personally has much more significance and long term payment than a job does. Do not get me wrong, I love my job and I think there is much significance and long term payoff in my role. However, when I was slinging coffee, my job started when I clocked in and ended when I clocked out. The long term significance lasted as long as caffeine buzz and a trip to the bathroom. 

I was left to grow and develop on my own during those days. I did not have someone who paid me to grow as a person. There was no responsibility or eternal significance to my success or failure as a barista. Thus I had to motivate myself. I had to push myself to grow and get out of my comfort zone. I was not using any solid metrics to ensure I was growing. To a large extent, I still do not use any excellent metrics. What is worse, I usually have no clue how I am doing in progressing towards accomplishing my goals. 

I need to assess regularly. I need to look at my goals more often, be reminded of what I want to achieve, who I want to become. Where I want to go in life. I need to look at where I am at more often. There is a detrimental side to this where I assess too often and am defeated by measuring my lack of progress. I think for me I will start with assessing three or four times a year. Each phase of assessment will require me to recalibrate my interworking and assess my progress.

What are your goals? How often are you assessing them? What are your metrics to know if you are progressing.

Assessing,

–JT

Backpack

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Recently, I sat in an airport for longer than I would like to admit. I was waiting for a plane to decide whether or not it had the visibility to land. As we were all waiting, a couple of ladies started getting to know one another. I of course had nothing better to do than ‘drop some eaves’ as I was waiting. 

One of their discussion topics was the younger lady’s backpack. She loves her backpack. She enjoys everything about it and it has a lifetime warranty and she has had it repaired a few time and it works well and she truly wants it to be her only backpack for the rest of her life. 

The manufacturer has discontinued the make and model of her backpack. She previously would send it in for repairs and they would send her a new backpack or a refurbished backpack in the event her backpack needed to be replaced

Since they have now discontinued her backpack, they have to repair her backpack whenever she sends it in. This is ok with her, but what if she is unable to get it repaired at some point. One of her zippers is especially troublesome and might not survive. There is much to be concerned about as she described her backpack woes. 

I listened on and reflected about her story and realized I do the same thing she was doing. I get overly concerned about a niche product. I get overly zeroed in on the one detail I care about and lose the rest of the picture. 

A backpack is not this big of a deal. 

My favorite roast of coffee at Starbucks.

The restaurant discontinuing my favorite dish because it was unpopular.

Whether someone takes a photo or video horizontal is not that big of a deal.

There are things in life that are a big deal. They warrant fretting and consternation. There are things in life I can fight for and belabor the point on and do some good in the world. I should be concerned about the health, safety, and betterment of myself and the people around me. I should belabor those points.

I should be concerned about the thing that will effect my life in twenty years. I cannot let myself get so lost in the minutiae of the accouterments in my life.

What are your minutiae? Do you fuss over the long term as much as you do the accouterments?

Longterm,

–JT

Information Overload

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I generally give people information pretty freely. I will tell them about something or explain something or give them observations on what is happening or has happened and then I will often expect them to process the information I give them.

The issue is, I will usually expect people to process the information I give them the same way I do. I take it in, I churn it around, talk to myself about it, and then spew out an idea or thought I have in relationship to the information I am given or even take the idea inside and really rest on it for a while and let it sift me. 

When I give someone the information, I want them to be connected and engaged with the information, take it in, churn it around, and then spew how they will be changed by the revelation I have given them or the way the information changes things for them.

What actually happens is one of two things. When I tell someone something I think is monumental, he will sometimes take the information in, then start talking with me about the information, where it came from or how I got there, ask me about different aspects of the information, or simply, discredit the information all together. What he does is start externally processing the information. Which is what he does. He externally processes. 

Which makes sense when he is an external processor. 

I will in turn, walk away disappointed because the information missed the intended target and landed amongst the weeds, not on the target at all.

The second options is, I will give a piece of information to someone else and she will take it in, churn it around, and she will have little to say about it. The conversation will pretty much be over by the time I would expect her to spew out some ideas or changes to make based on the information. I then in turn get frustrated and try to reframe the conversation or reframe the idea or concept. I try to deliver the information in better packaging. Ultimately, everything lands the same with her and I walk away without hitting my mark again. This time it is almost as if I never fired a shot. 

Which makes sense. 

She is processing. 

Inside.

As she does.

Either way, I feel a bit like a failure. I walk away thinking I have done nothing in both instances. This highlights the issue to begin with.

My expectations of the situation were unfair to begin with. I thought too much of myself and expected too much from people when I showed up. I should have walked in more open–minded to these two people processing as they do and worked with them to process. I was working at them not with them. What is worse, I never even offered up a single expectation to these people before I lobbed my idea at them. I launched, watched, shook my head, and walked away.

Where are your expectations sideways for the situation? Where are you not voicing your expectations? Where are you thinking more of yourself than you ought?

Unexpecting,

–JT